My pal Dave Kuskie and I have been making radio programs since 2004. We call them “internet radio shows” because…well…they’re not podcasts. They’re a modern take on the radio comedies and dramas of the pre-television era, with sound effects, as many voice actors as we can beg to join us, and original scripts.
One of our series, “Scare On The Air”, is a more direct tribute to old time radio. In this one Dave and I are hosts introducing “classic” radio thrillers (which are made by us and not at all classic). Here, listen to our first episode–I’ll be back afterwards.
Our dear friend Jeremy Fifield is a guest actor…and Kalin Krohe is the MVP of that production, voicing elderly voice actor Mel Fresburg. We’ve used Mel in other shows because Kalin’s voice for him kills us. I even snuck Mel into a Dairy Queen commercial.
I love writing scripts for the radio theatre productions Dave and I do. And in general, I just enjoy writing. So a few weeks after we taped this show, I decided to write a full history of our fictional “Canine Creeper”. I based my phony history on very real elements of network radio–most notably its slow, sad decline as the 1950’s ushered in a seismic change in the way people listened to radio.
It’s been sitting on my computer for years. And now it’s on my website!
“The Canine Creeper” History
Written By A Man Who Has A Little Too Much Time On His Hands
Winter 1938–NBC Radio staff writer Harold Fibler writes a story treatment for the network’s “Keep A Light On” drama anthology about a man who, after being bitten by a dog, is able to hear what the dog is thinking. NBC East Coast programming gurus think the gimmick could sustain a series. Fibler expands his outline to a complete “audition script”.
The network shops the script to New York advertising agencies where it is seen by Wilbur & Healy, the firm handling the extremely lucrative Amish Oats account. W&H sign on behalf of Amish Oats to sponsor the program for Fall 1939. Unbeknownst to most Americans, the “Amish” interests in Amish Oats were bought out and severed years earlier. However, for years the company’s flagship product–Amish Oats Hot Cereal–keeps the package design and advertising language that were created by the original Mid-Eastern Amish Cooperative.
Spring 1939–NBC’s Rockefeller Plaza studios are abuzz as casting sessions begin for “The Canine Creeper.” New York stage actor Alexander Freed, who had spent the last several years bouncing from show to show on the Broadway stage, impresses Harold Fibler. Fibler is especially pleased with the realism and likeability Freed brings to his audition. As the creator of the series, Fibler’s pick gets the role. The network had wanted to take a chance on a dapper young newcomer named Vincent Price. Throughout the 17 year history of the series the vast majority of supporting roles week to week will be essayed by a core group of radio actors: Agnes Weatherbee, Bert Gould, Jimmy Tackaberry and April Bennett. These four actors worked 7 nights a week providing character voices on series airing on all three broadcast networks.
Summer 1939–One element is still missing. NBC’s sound engineers are having fits during “Canine Creeper” tech rehearsals, as they try in vain to accurately cue recorded dog barks and whines from sound effect transcription discs. Meanwhile, on the ground floor at 30 Rock, 20-year-old Mel Freesburg is entertaining himself with dog noises while waiting for his order at a luncheonette. Freesburg was blessed with the ability to mimic canine barks, whines, growls–and this was his moment of kismet. Harold Fibler, in the same delicatessen, whisked Freesburg up to 14 where he was hired on the spot. Not once in the 17 year run was Freesburg unable to provide what Fibler required for his scripts.
September 12, 1939. The first episode of “The Canine Creeper” airs live.
1939 to March 1941–Week after week, Harold Fibler’s scripts combined with the performances of Alex Freed and Mel Freesburg to captivate the nation. In early 1940 Amish Oats found room on its heretofore untarnished packaging for a portrait of Freed and a plug for the series. King Features Syndicate launched a “Canine Creeper” comic strip which ran in some rural papers all the way through 1968!
April 1941–War temporarily claims the star of the broadcast as Alexander Freed is drafted by the United States Navy. Supporting players Gould and Tackaberry are also drafted. Even series announcer Goodman Von Zell is withdrawn for service in the USO. For just over four years, Mel Freesburg is burdened with the Herculean task of voicing every single male role on the broadcast. Because the military service of the other actors gets big publicity, the listening audience continues to support the broadcast. The ratings hang tough, and even improve. However, for contractual reasons, Alexander Freed is still given star billing each week. Very few Americans know that Freesburg is doing the heavy lifting. Freesburg will gain a higher profile starting in 1947, when his billing is upgraded from “dog noises provided by” to “Co-Starring.”
May 1945–Alexander Freed returns to the broadcast after receiving his honorable discharge.
Fall 1945–After six years and 312 scripts, creator Harold Fibler feels the first real strain of writer’s block. His way out of the trap is an ingenious continuing storyline that begins with the broadcast of September 29, 1945. The Detective Muir character is accused of murder–and when the police department shows little support, Muir flees his hometown on a nationwide journey to find the real killer. (If this storyline sounds familiar, so did the concept for “The Fugitive” when Fibler’s widow saw it on television. Her lawsuit against Quinn Martin Productions was settled out of court.) The “Muir On The Run” storyline ran for over one full year. Some episodes moved the original “wrongfully accused of murder” plot forward, while others found Muir helping strangers through his unusual gift. (This allowed Fibler to get away with re-using old stories with minimal adjustments such as a new locale.)
Fall 1946–When the “Muir On The Run” storyline is finally given a satisfying conclusion–with Detective Muir returned to his post–the series returns to a non-continuing format. Fibler is spending more time devising plots and scripts for the series, with the actual product ranging from decent to mediocre. Like many radio scriptwriters, Fibler is an alcoholic. His 15 hour days are ruining his marriage, and he feels trapped in a format that, in his mind, has been completely tapped out.
Meanwhile, Alexander Freed is also suffering from occupational claustrophobia; he demands that the series take summers off so he can fly to Hollywood and make movies. NBC, knowing that Amish Oats is willing to pay for 52 weeks of new broadcasts each year, comes up with another plan. From March through May, starting in the ’46-’47 season, the “Creeper” production team makes two episodes per week. One is done live; the second is transcribed on disc the same night. During the summer, the transcribed episodes are aired. Most of the staff likes the accelerated production schedule because it means summers off. But to Harold Fibler, a man increasingly possessed by his own demons, it means grinding out more stories faster. The American radio audience knows none of this: while other radio series are experiencing ratings stagnation in the wake of early interest in television, “The Canine Creeper” is rock solid. Amish Oats is pre-signed through 1952.
February 9, 1950–Harold Fibler, intoxicated and deep in depression following a phone call from his wife, leaps to his death from a 14th floor office window at 30 Rock. NBC is aghast, and makes no bones about their real concern: keeping their cash cow fed with scripts. Anne Drysdale, a continuity supervisor, is reassigned as Story Editor for The Canine Creeper. In the trade press, NBC touts its stable of in-house and free lance writers as a solid replacement for Fibler. Behind the scenes, Drysdale’s unspoken job is to unearth scripts from previous “thriller” anthologies–“Keep A Light On”, “Gooseflesh Theater”, “Spook!”, etc–and adapt them to the Canine Creeper format. Astonishingly, this ruse does not immdiately affect ratings–which do eventually dip as television gains dominance.
Spring 1952–NBC is about to sign Amish Oats for another two years of “The Canine Creeper”. Meanwhile, Alexander Freed (whose contract is up for renewal) is spending the weekend in Hollywood shooting a very rough pilot film for a proposed TV series, “Justice Squad.” Several days later, NBC Television orders a full 39-episode season of “Justice Squad”. In New York, NBC Radio is apoplectic. Angry phone calls from east coast to west coast peacocks ensue. Recasting the role of Detective Muir is not an option. Amish Oats wants Freed. Finally, a West Coast programming executive recalls hearing that Mary Livingstone, suffering from stage fright, records her “Jack Benny Program” dialogue seperately–Joan Benny plays her role in front of the audience and her “loose lines” are tape-edited into the final broadcast. This proves to be the compromise. From the ’52’-’53 season on, Freed walks into NBC’s Burbank radio facility each week and reads his lines for the next episode. His lines are recorded on open reel tape and shipped to New York. (Eventually Freed’s line readings are sent via closed-circuit to NBC New York and recorded by an engineer there.)
Spring 1954–After two years of episodes that are built from Frankensteined scripts and cobbled-together dialogue, Amish Oats is up for renewal–but NBC is convinced that “The Canine Creeper” is completely drained of profit potential. Ratings are down and “The Canine Creeper” is one of the final hangers-on in a skeleton schedule of scripted network radio programming. But it’s at this point that fate–and spite–keeps the Creeper on life support.
In mid-1954 Amish Oats–which by this point had been using the series to promote its top selling cold cereals like Space Crunchies and Wagon Wheels–was purchased by Worldwide Eating, a huge conglomerate of beloved brands that Worldwide had swallowed up over the past decade. Although the phrase wasn’t as well-known at the time, these were essentially hostile takeovers. Amish Oats was Worldwide Eating’s entry into the lucrative cereal market–the AO board of directors knew it and they didn’t go down without a fight, demanding a certain degree of autonomy during the transition period. One key bargaining point: Amish Oats retained the final say on advertising decisions for the first two years under Worldwide ownership.
Feeling defeated and perhaps a bit nostalgic upon the takeover, the Amish Oats board went to NBC with $96,000–a year’s worth of 1954-1955 sponsorship money for The Canine Creeper. By this time, however, the NBC Radio Network had completely dismantled its schedule of dramatic series, giving prime time hours back to its affiliates. Shell-shocked by AO’s bankroll, NBC quickly came up with a radical concept. “Canine Creeper” would now be a “strip”–5 programs a week, Monday-thru-Friday. The series would fill a 15 minute time slot. New episodes would be produced, but would air only on Mondays. Previous episodes from the 1950 season forward would be re-edited and aired as “cliffhangers” spread across Tuesday/Wednesday and Thursday/Friday. NBC aired the series weeknights at 6:15pm EST. Clearances (the number of stations carrying the series) plummeted as many affiliates chose to air local programming in that hour. NBC waited for a call from Amish Oats demanding “makegood” commercials be aired…but the call never came.
The 52 new episodes that were produced that year left a lot to be desired. Freed, still phoning it in from Hollywood, seemed completely bored and detached in his performances. Anne Drysdale was taking Harold Fibler’s earliest scripts from the 1939 season and hacking them down to a 15-minute running time. Even Mel Freesburg looked at “Canine Creeper” as a sidelight by this point; the extremely talented voice artist was constantly booked for animation voice-overs (bark-overs?), childrens records and commercials. Most of this work was based in Los Angeles, but Freesburg was in such high demand that producers came to him.
NBC was winding down the final month of what everyone agreed was an unrewarding ’54-’55 season…preparing to finally release Alexander Freed and Mel Freesburg from their radio contracts…when another call came from Amish Oats. They had one more year with their hands on the Worldwide Eating cookie jar. They wanted one more year of “Canine Creeper”.
By this time NBC and AO’s reps at Wilbur and Healy understood that the Amish Oats board was thumbing their nose at Worldwide Eating. But the network was unwilling to try to clear the 15 minute strip for another year. NBC Radio Network Vice President Dale ‘Patch’ Weaver recalls:
We couldn’t laugh at the money. $109,000 for another year of this haggard old relic. The show cost next-to-nothing to produce…but we were convinced that our new ‘Monitor’ project was the way radio was going! I didn’t want to compromise the launch of Monitor by shoehorning this thing in there. They had already convinced us to find spots for Fibber McGee and Molly on Monitor, which to me completely violated the contemporary flavor of the show. Anyway, through our agency contacts we understood that the Amish Oats guys were basically saying **** you to Worldwide Eating. So we looked at the schedule…can we find a spot that has 100% clearance that we can carve out for this? And we saw Sunday morning…6:00am….”Hour Of Blessings.”
“Hour Of Blessings” was a 60 minute block of gospel music provided to affiliates as a public service. Premiering in 1932, “Hour Of Blessings” was originally performed live with a full chorus and orchestra in historic studio 8H. By 1955–with all of network radio cut back to the bone– the series consisted of gospel records and transcription recordings from previous episodes. NBC decided that 55 minutes of “Blessings” was enough, and scheduled “The Canine Creeper” Sundays at 6:55am, in a “5 minute mystery” format that set up an extremely basic story and wrapped it up neatly. Weaver recalls:
We gave them everything they wanted! It still had Alexander Freed, it was still new episodes every week–in fact, to my mind it was an improvement from that feeble 15-minute strip, because at least in this case you had 100% clearance along the entire radio network at the same time every week. And again, the truth is…nobody at the company [Amish Oats] really cared. They were just blowing off money that would have sat there unspent.
To economize production, the entire 52-week season of 5-minute “Creeper”s was taped in 3 marathon sessions with a skeleton crew consisting of Mel Freesburg and an NBC Radio engineer equipped with Alexander Freed’s lines. (Announcer Goodman Von Zell recorded one set of open and close announcements which were re-used each week; as an AFTRA member he was paid scale for the recording session AND each of the 52 air dates.)
On August 26, 1956, the final 5-minute episode of “The Canine Creeper” aired on the NBC Radio Network. The humble end of one of the great radio thrillers of all time.
POST SCRIPT:
Alexander Freed found himself even more in demand when “Justice Patrol” became TV’s #1 rated drama for the first 8 of its 9 seasons on NBC-TV. Freed went on to do summer stock and guest shots on a variety of prime time series. In 1985 NBC Radio offered classic half-hour episodes of “The Canine Creeper” as a weekend syndication offering, with new wraparounds by Freed. Alexander Freed died in 1994.
Mel Freesburg relocated to Los Angeles the day after his final “Canine Creeper” recording session in 1956. He immediately began work as “special business foley artist” on the “Lassie” TV series, providing barks, growls and whines for Lassie in scenes where the natural audio was unusable. Freesburg provided these and similar services to over 300 movies and television series, including a fill-in session as “Simpsons” dog Santa’s Little Helper in 1990 when Frank Welker was stricken with laryngitis. Mel Freesburg is retired, and lives in Los Angeles.
“The Canine Creeper” was reborn in 1960 when NBC produced a weekly television series based on the radio program. Harold Fibler’s first season of radio stories was consulted, and several episodes were extremely close remakes of Fibler scripts. Because Alexander Freed was filming the final season of “Justice Patrol”, the Detective Muir character was portrayed by a young Charles Bronson. The story of a man who can hear the thoughts of dogs did not translate to a visual medium, and the series was cancelled after one season. The 32 television episodes of The Canine Creeper aired briefly on the CBN cable network in the early 1980s.