Hello, and welcome to a Russian doll blog post. Writing within writing within writing.
This is 2020, tubby, quarantined, occasionally irritable for no discernible reason Wenty. I was watching DVDs of “Here’s Lucy” this evening (yeah, yeah, your taste in stuff sucks too) and I remembered that I met Lucie Arnaz in 2005. It’s not a great story. But it happened at a really fun event. And someday, as God is my witness, I will do really fun things again.
Okay, here’s 2005 Wenty talking about the event…written for my My Space blog which may have had greater viewership than this.
I just got back from attending the Friends Of Old-Time Radio Convention in Newark, New Jersey. Hopefully anyone reading this has at least a basic understanding of what “old time radio” refers to…basically, network radio used to provide the kind of entertainment TV does now–sitcoms, dramas, game shows, soap operas, mysteries and kiddie shows (remember the scene in “A Christmas Story” where Ralphie and his brother run over to the big olde family radio to hear “Little Orphan Annie”?) What the convention really celebrates, in addition to specific remembrances of shows like “Fibber McGee and Molly” and “The Shadow”, is the art of radio theater–being able to craft stories and scenarios with voices and sound effects that entertain you but also stimulate your imagination.
Most of the special guests at the convention were names that were not familiar to me, but their work certainly was. For example, at the dinner buffet on the first night of the convention, I was seated at a table with a fellow named Stuffy Singer. In the 40s and 50s he was a child actor who voiced a neighborhood kid in several episodes of Jack Benny’s radio program.
The guests at the convention that were fairly famous included:
Lucie Arnaz–actress, singer and daughter of Lucille Ball. I rode in an elevator with her and she was very nice…and, if I may say, she looks like a million dollars.
2020 Wenty: She asked if I was having a good time. I said yes. That was it. I also met Eddie Carroll, the voice of Jiminy Cricket and a Jack Benny impersonator, in an elevator. Some other people were in the elevator and they made some Benny jokes (“Where’d you park the Maxwell?”, etc.)
I have interviewed some pretty notable people over the phone…but anytime I encounter someone famous in person I tend to get really nervous. I just don’t want to say anything stupid.
Bill Dana–Best known in the 60’s for his character of Jose Jimenez (“My name…Jose Jimenez.”) He also had a reocurring role as Sophia’s brother on “Golden Girls.” Still very funny. Older than the hills.
Chuck McCann–Voiceover artist, actor, commercial icon. He plays a crazy judge on this week’s episode of “Boston Legal.” And he was the original voice of Sonny the Cocoa Puffs cuckoo bird. I actually met this fellow in 1979 when I was 7 years old, at Knotts Berry Farm in California. I said hello to him at the convention and although he didn’t remember me (duh)…he still shook my hand and gave me a big ol’ bear hug. Nice guy! Ask your parents about the Right Guard antiperspirant commercials in the 70s with the guy in the medicine cabinet. That was him.
Joe Franklin–When our family got cable in 1987, the first two oddities I discovered were Morton Downey Jr. and Joe Franklin….both had locally-produced TV shows on WWOR. Joe Franklin currently has a weekly radio show called “Memory Lane”, and he still looks like he did back in 1987.
Here is a transcript of my encounter with Joe Franklin.
ME: It’s great to see you, I always loved your television show.
JOE: Are you having a good time here?
ME: Yeah, it’s been a blast.
JOE: How old are we now?
ME: I’m 35.
JOE: You look 12 years old, God bless you.
It was fun to meet and see some of these people, but the real fun came in the many recreations of old-time radio programs. A row of microphones line the front of the stage, as the cast of players shift back and forth to speak their lines of dialogue. Behind them is a large table with unusual items like a miniature working door frame, telephone box, drinking glasses, pitcher of water, etc. Plus a small section of wooden floor tile wired for sound to simulate footsteps. And in front of the whole mess of it is the director, who makes the same kinds of hand-pointing motions as an orchestra conductor, only in this case he’s conducting the mixture of voices, sound effects and live music cues being played on piano. There’s no Cool Edit here; no second takes. It’s live, being created in the moment…and that’s how they did it on radio for over a quarter-century, before TV came along and made radio turn into something altogether different.
That’s about all I care to write at the moment…more to come, including the previously promised story of how I ended up skipping out on the Saturday night entertainment to drink wine with three strange women in their hotel room.
2020 Wenty: Here’s something I wrote when I posted this on an older blog of mine in 2013:
Well, I am nothing if not dedicated to keeping promises. And heck, it’s only 8 years later!
This was a very classy event, and I felt under-dressed at everything. Most of us hear “convention” and think “Well, if I take a shower and wear a belt, I’ll be several marks above most attendees.” (Seriously…so much unwanted butt crack at every comic book convention I’ve ever attended.) But this was, like I said, a classy affair–except, there were these ladies…a mother, her daughter and her sister. They were a wee bit rowdy, and they sparked up a conversation with me at one of the early dinner banquets. (I stuck out in the room as the only person there by choice who was under 60.)
By the final night we were pals…and although I really, REALLY wanted to see Eddie Carroll recreate “The Jack Benny Program” (just Google those names–or don’t), the ladies had decided they were ready to call it a night…and invited me up to their room for wine and chitchat. So heck…why not? These are the fun, unpredictable parts of vacations that you remember long after the bags are unpacked. The ladies and I talked about my wacky world of small town radio, their busy lives (the mother was on the Board Of Trustees at the Lucille Ball/Desi Arnaz Museum in Jamestown, NY!) and just a bit of everything.
It’s fun making friends.
2020 Wenty: Is this getting annoying yet? We’re almost done.
This trip was truly unforgettable for me…I think I may have attended the last one of these Old Time Radio conventions. Wish I’d gotten in on that earlier. I love radio drama and really dug interacting with other fans. I tend to obsess over things nobody else within 1,200 miles is interested in, so chances like this are rare.
This trip also is unforgettable because it was my chance to see a “Late Show With David Letterman” taping. But that’s another story for another time.