Part 1 Originally Aired September 12, 1978 on ABC (60-minute episode)
Part 2 Originally Aired September 19, 1978 on ABC
Before we go west with the Cunninghams… what do Sherwood Schwartz and Garry Marshall have in common?
Well, they both gained experience writing for comedy legends; Schwartz for Red Skelton and Bob Hope, and Marshall for Danny Thomas and Lucille Ball. They both created timeless sitcoms that have become a part of our shared pop culture heritage. They both created some duds (Schwartz’ cavemen in modern times series “It’s About Time”; Marshall’s “Blansky’s Beauties”, “Out Of The Blue”, “Joanie Loves Chachi”…yeah, he definitely wins that trophy.)
But for purposes of our discussion, both of these sitcom giants sent their best-loved families on wild west adventures. The Bradys, as part of their Grand Canyon epic, spent some time in a ghost town where an old prospector (the marvelous Jim Backus) locks them all in jail for fear they will steal his gold claim. It all ends well for the Bunch, like always. We’ll see how things go for the Cunninghams shortly.
But the point I hope to make here is this: Sherwood Schwartz and Garry Marshall were clever producers. They both made exciting “vacation” stories for their series but didn’t have to go more than an hour’s drive from the Paramount lot. The Bradys’ “ghost town” was a backlot set–but they really did go to the Canyon, and of course later would shoot an ambitious season opening trio of episodes in Hawaii. “Happy Days”, for comparison, got 90 minutes out of a trip to Hollywood…and another 90 minutes out of a trip to a “Colorado” dude ranch, which was almost certainly a Southern California movie ranch paired with stock footage of the Rockies.
Having said that, “Westward Ho” is the last and most impressive of the genuine “epic” multi-parters. There are other multi-part episodes to come and we’ll cover them all. But this is the last big blockbuster. It’s filmed almost entirely at out-of-studio exterior locations, and beautifully shot. There’s a real effort made in the music scoring to match the visuals and locale–no typical 50’s doo-wop stings here. And there are some impressive stunt sequences. Interior scenes are used sparingly and plainly not filmed with a live audience. (I have acute recognition of when it’s a laugh track and when it’s a live audience. Or even when it’s a bit of both. Years and years of Nick at Nite will do that for you.)
As our story begins the Cunningham family is frantically packing to go to Colorado. Marion’s brother Ben, owner of a tourist dude ranch, is ill. The C’s are headed to take over the ranch and prevent it from being foreclosed upon by a ne’er-do-well sidewinder (and fan of setting off firecrackers at inopportune times) named H. R. Buchanan.
The gang arrives at the ranch, with Potsie, Ralph and even Big Al along to help run the place. (Yet again poor Chachi gets the shaft. I guess somebody had to take Fonzie’s phone messages in the men’s room at Arnold’s.) After a nasty encounter with “Mr. Sidewinder”, as Marion cordially calls Buchanan, the group discovers foxy ranchhand Thunder in the pool. After tossing Ralph Malph in the pool (“Ornery. Take my word for it.”) Thunder apologizes and welcomes everyone to the ranch.
Guests arrive in droves and Mr. and Mrs. C welcome them. Potsie hits Ralph in the head with a suitcase. Richie summarizes their first day: “Three horses got loose. Ralph almost hung himself trying to hang up the lights. Al has cooked nothing but beans, and Potsie dumped all the sheets in the swimming pool.”
Inside the mess hall (is that what they would call it on a dude ranch? Feedbag maybe?) Thunder confirms with Mr. and Mrs. C that the ranch’s annual rodeo will go on as scheduled. Al presents a raw side of beef that he plans to cook over an open fire. And Fonzie, who has met up with the gang at the ranch, uses his magic finger snap to summon a bevy of beauties.
Thunder and Richie go for a trail ride. Thunder tells Richie about an old Indian legend…if two people meet by the lake and are truly in love, an indian maiden’s weeping can be heard.
Before we can hear (or not hear) the weeping, Buchanan and his cronies ride in to enter his boys in the rodeo. When they threaten to stir up trouble, Fonzie uses the finger snap and the sidewinder’s horses turn tail and run. (Richie: “It had to be female horses.”)
“Her name’s Thunder? I’m gonna go over there and see if I can make some lightning,” says Fonzie after Richie tells him about the ornery ranchhand. But Thunder turns The Fonz down cold! Fortunately he’s able to snap some random tourist chicks into his arms.
It’s nightfall and Barn Dance time in the–feedbag? Dance hall? Arnold’s set covered with fake wood and western props? Anyway, everybody does the Virginia Reel and it brings back bad flashbacks of square dancing in gym class. I can’t dance. I can barely walk without falling. But Richie and Fonz and the gang are very game. Fonz tries again with Thunder, and gets the shaft yet again.
The 7th Annual Bar A Rodeo is on! Mrs. C does tricks on a dancing horse. Richie and Al drive the chuck wagon, a bitter reminder to the guests that Al’s side of beef hasn’t cooked yet. Joanie portrays Annie Oakley, with gun. Potsie pulls Ralph on a burro. Fonzie rides his motorcycle.
And then….DIABLO! The killer bull! The Cattlemans Association pays $1,000 to the first person to stay on Diablo for 8 seconds. Let’s pretend we don’t know who that will be.
Fonzie and Richie get into a squabble over Thunder. In this scene and a couple of others from this episode Fonzie calls Richie “Carrot”. It doesn’t stick, for good reason.
Joanie, to impress a boy (need we say that he’s such a hunk?) participates in the trick riding competition…by accident.
Then, because it wouldn’t be a Happy Days Epic without the crooning of Anson Williams, Potsie sings “Rodeo Cowboy” (music and lyrics by Ron Rose and Anson Williams). This YouTube video dubs it a “cheesy montage” but I think it’s really well done. Also, if you’re watching “Happy Days” and you’re shocked to find it gets cheesy sometimes….well, you need to be paying more attention.
Meanwhile, back at the Cook House–Feedbag, dance hall, whatever–the guests are reaching their limit with Al’s cavalcade of bean dishes (Al on the side of beef: “It just passed medium raw!”). Only an impassioned speech by Richie calms the angry mob:
“Listen up! Al’s trying his best! In the old days you would have had to go out and trap your own dinner! Squirrels! Skunks! That’s right, P.U. skunks!”
Mr. and Mrs. C are going over the numbers…they’re close to bailing Uncle Ben out but not quite there.
Joanie is in a wagon hitched to a couple of horses, playing “loves me/loves me not” with a flower when Buchanan rides up to remind the Cunninghams that they only have 24 hours left to pay the bills. The sidewinder throws a firecracker on the ground which spooks the horses, who take off with Joanie at breakneck speed! Joanie, unable to reach the reins, screams for help–Fonzie, Richie and Thunder roar into action–Fonz and RIchie on motorcycle, Thunder on horseback.
Richie and Fonz approach a ditch.
FONZ: Hold on Cunningham!
RICHIE: Why?
FONZ: You don’t wanna know!
JOANIE: Fonzie! Watch out for the ditch!
FONZ: Ay-y-y-y-y-y-y-yy-y!
TO BE CONTINUED!
As we open Part 2, Big Al recaps the events of episode one via letter to his Mama. The scene of Joanie’s unexpected trip is replayed and we discover that Richie and Fonzie survived the run into the ditch (thank heavens!). They get close to Joanie’s wagon and Richie jumps on, where he is able to leap down between the two horses and grab the reins. Thunder applauds RIchie’s bravery and ignores The Fonz. “Nobody wants to listen to me here,” bemoans our leather-jacketed hero. Richie, noticing Fonzie’s downhearted demeanor, brings him up for a round of applause at the feedbag, or bunkhouse, or whatever.
Hey! Remember like a year ago when I told you about the old Indian legend by the lake? How if two people are standing by the lake who are really in love, they hear an Indian maiden weeping. Well, just in case you had any doubts, Mr. and Mrs. C visit the lake and hear the weeping.
Thunder may be doing a different kind of weeping, because Richie is letting her down easy–what with Lori Beth waiting back in Milwaukee and all. But wait! Are you ready for this plot twist!??! Thunder likes Fonzie! She was just shy, or playing hard to get, or some such. So Fonzie’s inscrutable powers with the opposite sex remain unchallenged.
Unfortunately Mr. and Mrs. C are just a bit over $1,000 shy of what they need to get the title to the ranch back. Fonzie decides he’ll ride the killer bull, last 8 seconds, win the thousand, and save the ranch. And he does. Goodnight everybody!
Well…no. There’s some stuff before that. Richie has the “I can’t believe you’re going to do this” talk. Fonz reminds everyone the word “can’t” isn’t in the Fonzarelli vocabulary. Buchanan extends the deadline just so he can watch Fonzie get trampled. Thunder gives Fonz a kiss for luck and a scarf, also for good luck.
FONZ: What’s this rope for?
RICHIE: You hold onto that!
FONZ: I knew that!
And then, Fonzie hops on Diablo, stays on for eight seconds and wins the prize money! But the bull is angry about this. Because bulls are proud, proud animals and do not cotton to being publicly shamed. So Diablo chases after Fonz who ducks into a red barrel. RIchie uses a red cape to distract the killer bull and get him back into the pen.
Mr. C presents the $1,000 check to Mr. Sidewinder and the gang pitches in their dollars and cents to make up the remainder. “So long, sidewinder!” taunts Mrs. C. Potsie sings “Tumblin’ Tumbleweed” as the group enjoys a hayride.
MR. C: Maam, you just make my heart palpitate like a doggie in fresh grass.
MRS. C: Oh….I’m sorry, dear.
Thunder invites Richie and Fonzie for one last ride, and this time Fonzie braves actually riding on a horse. They ride into the sunset.
Oh! And Al’s side of beef finally cooked all the way through…as we find out in a letter from Uncle Ben Mrs. C reads to everyone after they get home.
Random Notes:
-Thunder’s horse is named Licorice, because the horse likes to eat licorice. Ralph finds this amusing.
RALPH: I love banana splits. Nobody calls me bananas.
POTSIE: Not to your face.
-Catchphrase watch: Richie and Joanie match each other “bucko” for :hunk” all the way through. And when Joanie announces her intentions to participate in Trick Riding, big brother doubts she is skilled enough to ride a horse at such high speeds..
JOANIE: Sit on it, Rich!
RICHIE: You just make sure YOU sit on it!
-Okay, so the original air dates for these episodes show a one-hour part 1 for the season premiere, followed by a 30-minute Part 2 the following week. Just like the demo derby and Hollywood sagas. But on my Happy Days DVD set, that Part 2 episode has an on-screen graphic reading “Westward Ho Part 3”. So either a special graphic was prepared for later syndication and that’s the print of the episode they used for DVD (entirely possible)…or, they just put “Part 3” on it from the very beginning knowing that eventually it would be rerun as the third half hour. (Also possible, but I would think people would notice something like that.)
Next Time: Fonzie, we hardly knew ye….